Resolving Interpersonal Conflict (Post #2)

Nobody likes to face any interpersonal conflicts, especially if the conflict is between friends. I am someone who would try to bury the hatchet and not hold grudges should such a situation occur. I consider myself a fairly introvert person, but I am not afraid to speak up if necessary. 

This particular conflict involved myself and a fellow athlete during competition.

(For clarity, my team shall be named Team A, and our rival team named Team B)

One interpersonal conflict that I can recall happened about two years ago. As mentioned in my previous post, I compete regularly as a track and field sprinter. At a particular local athletics meet, I participated in the 4x100m relay.

Since the track and field fraternity in Singapore is fairly small, most of us know one another personally. As such, we were rivals on the track, friends off it. That said, respect and humility for each other is still a very important part in any sport and of course, in life too. One particular athlete crossed that line during this race- "Harry", the anchor runner for Team B, was a respected athlete by me and I considered him a good friend. However, this incident changed all that.

The race was exciting and exhilarating from the start till the end as both top teams were matched stride for stride. Both Team A and Team B passed off the baton to their respective anchor runners almost simultaneously. However, knowing that Team A's runner is much slower, Team B's anchor runner, Harry, was confident enough to run almost the entire race while turning his head to "look" at Team A's anchor runner. He completed this un-sportsmanship behaviour with hand gestures close to the finish line- as if to imply that he is unbeatable. 

Perhaps it was adrenaline and excitement that got the better of Harry. It is one thing to celebrate because you or your team is winning, but a complete different aspect when your actions are directed to the losing team.

Harry has always been known to be an arrogant and proud person. But every action has a limit.
I was not the only one who noticed or condemned Harry's inappropriate behaviour. With video replays shown around the stadium, I had a clear look of the events that unfolded. To say the least, I was disgusted with Harry's behaviour. Hence, when asked during a media interview after the race, I commented that "I felt his actions were unprofessional and a disgrace to athletics." Needless to say, relations between myself and Harry deteriorated, and we never saw eye to eye for the next few months.

  

However, as fate would have it, both Harry and I were drawn into the same relay team for a combined Universities Team. As I was appointed Captain of the team, it only made sense for me to try to mend this relationship not only for us, but for the sake of the team too.

Firstly, I dropped him an email apologizing for my comments, but at the same time, pointing out that his actions were uncalled for. I was sincere in my apology, but an email would not solve everything. Thus, I took the opportunity to speak to Harry personally when I saw him. 


Presently, things are not rosy between Harry and I- but I make it a point to start small talks with him when I see him. The ball is in his court.

How many times have we held grudges against someone who may have wronged you?

If we just “let it go” and try to mend strained relationships, perhaps the world would be a better place.